DIFFICULT CONVERSATIONS:

• – People almost never change without first feeling understand.
• – Treat people with DECENCY and INTEGRITY.
• – It requires you to look hard at yourself and to change and grow.
• – Stronger sense of integrity and self – respect.
• – Not the question of eliminating fear and anxiety but reducing fear and anxiety & managing them.
• – You should know when to release an issue and when to let go the issue.
• – Feelings are the heart of the the situations: feelings are usually complex .
• – Stop arguing about who is right: explore each others stories.
• – Disagreement is not a bad thing.
• – Feelings and relations Vs. power and status .
• – Be aware of biased perception ! Move from certainity to curiosity ie. how can they think that??= I wonder what information they have that i don’t.
• – Get curious about what you don’t know about yourself.
• – Norsham & I both depressed but not knowing why the other is depressed.
• – Distangle INTENT from the IMPACT.
• While we deeply care about peoples intention towards us, we don’t really know what their intention are. We assume intentions from the impacts on us.
• – We assume the worst ; we treat ourselves more charitabely: when we think others have bad intentions towards us , it effects our behaviour!! Vicious chain!! Intentions are often more complex than just ‘good’ or ‘bad’.
• – Attributing intentions , defending ourselves and ignoring the impact . Share the impact on you; inquire about their intentions.